I haven’t been able to write much. Yes, I was busy this week with parent-teacher-student conferences and long days and more meetings, but I also have had time to wind down in the evenings and when I sit down in front of the computer, the fingers type emails and browse wedding sites, but that’s as far as it goes. Then occasionally browse jobs sites and search volunteer databases for my dream jobs with Amnesty or Unicef, but they do not type glorious words across the keyboard. Perhaps it was the snow that showered us on Wednesday, just a few days after April arrived. I know that Switzerland was not alone in the phenomenon, as I watched NYC get a white shower as well on the World Weather Report.
Ali called me today to tell me another accomplishment had been made in his world and I stood there in the dressing room with a veil on my head and a wedding dress snuggly fit on my body. I wearing a wedding dress. And it was very exciting. I have been searching the net for styles I like, finding dresses that are outrageously priced that I still secretly love and want to appear in my wardrobe. Then I arrive at the shops in Zurich, with my friend Bianca, and everything I try on is nothing like I thought I would.
I find three that I like, one at each store and they are all as different from each other as they are different from the one I had envisioned. And in each of them I felt something different. In the first I felt like a princess. The second, sophisticated and sexy. The third, very romantic. And they each suited me. But none of their prices did. And not only do I refuse to spend thousands (even one) of dollars or francs or pounds on a dress because I. CAN. NOT. AFFORD. IT. But also because I don’t think it’s ethical. There is no need to spend so much on a dress that I will only wear once. Besides, now I can search for the dress that embodies all three of what I wore today. Princess. Sophisticated. Romantic. Sexy. Me.
So that’s why I haven’t been writing. Our wedding is in September and today I was told that the current season for dresses is coming to a close and that the next set won’t come in until June or July and that’s not enough time to order and alter the beauty.
And if my mom was here, we could just make one together. I missed her a lot today. I wanted her to be there so badly. She knows me the best, aside from ali, and he can’t see me in my wedding dress before the wedding.
Sigh. So I will go shopping in London where I hope to have some more success, although I will be going solo. I am determined to find something just right that fits comfortably with my pocket book as well. But now I have a better idea of what I am looking for and bridal dresses continue to dance in my head. I’m not complaining. It’s a lot of work, but this wedding stuff is fun. Dreams come true. One at a time.